Best AND Worst

Recently I heard one of the nicest compliments ever about our local homeschool group. This member lady said,"I never feel like just a number in this group. Our homeschool group feels very friendly and close." This really made me feel good, because as president of the homeschool group, this had been one of my main goals.

However, my 'happy bubble' was burst a few days later when I was making some calls. One family that hadn't attended in a while emphatically informed me that they had never felt at home or in fellowship with our group, they didn't like the different religious views, and they were opposed to some of the homeschool philosophies in the group. I was a little stunned, but continued to talk with this lady to investigate the root of these struggles.

What do you do in times like these? How do you deal with your feelings inside when confronted like this?

• First, you don't take it personally. I know, it's very difficult! I had to swallow a couple of times, send a prayer-flare, and focus on trying to learn from the problem instead of internalizing it.
• Then ask a few clarifying questions while you settle your feelings and get a handle on the true cause of the discontent. I started with the fellowship, asking her to describe when she felt left out. Ended up it was on a FYI field trip where everyone took their families through the displays on their own. It was a misconception about the type of field trip. Then I tackled the religious view differences and the homeschool philosophies that she had encountered.
• As we discussed each one, I realized that most of these were things that I couldn't change her mind on. At that point, I just reassured her of her welcome, pointed out a couple of things to counter her viewpoint, and let her go.
• Yes, I ended it. I wished her well, telling her I hoped she would find a perfect fellowship for her and her son. Sometimes that is the best policy. Don't beg them to stay, or try to fix it perfectly. Let them go with genuine care and kindness.
• Next, realize what you can learn and improve. Put your energy into doing what you truly can do. Nurture the strengths of the group. Follow your God-given goals for the group and the purpose of your homeschool group.
• Remember, you can't please everyone, so again, don't take it personally!
• Oh, and yeah. . . . focus on the compliment again! Look at all the families that ARE receiving strength from your group. You are doing a great service! Your ministering IS making a difference.

You are a Homeschool Group LEADER! Thank you.
Denise

To Lead or Not to Lead

It's disappointing. No one is stepping up to lead your homeschool group. Everyone keeps returning huge "NO's" when you ask them to help lead. Who will step up and keep the homeschool group going forward? Your mind screams, "Enough of the excuses!" You have explained the need of the homeschool group, but it has not been enough to motivate individuals to take on the responsibility.

You CAN overcome, and even prevent, objections like the following that normally paralyze many homeschoolers from accepting a leadership position.

"It will take too much time. I'm too busy."

"I don't want to look greedy for power or like I want to lead. After all, the first shall be last, and it doesn't seem humble to accept."

"Someone else can do it better."

"I don't have a clue what to do."

"Would it mean that I have to speak in front of the group sometimes? I hate speaking in front of people."

You can set their mind at ease and educate them with the truth. You might feel like you want to roll your eyes and tell them everyone else is busy as well, etc. But it is better to anticipate their objections and approach each potential homeschool leader with empathy and respect.

Objection 1: It will take too much time. I'm busy. Be understanding of their time concerns. Be honest with them of the time it takes you to do the job or fulfill the position. Find out how many responsibilities they have and whether it would be good for them to add one more. Encourage them that you asked them because you know that busy people know how to organize their time and get things done.

Objection 2: I don't want to look greedy for power. The truth is that this is a servant's position that is going to take a servant's heart. It may look like a "high position," but it is instead a foundational one that lives out serving others in love daily. Most people wish to make a difference in people's lives; point out that this opportunity to minister to homeschooling families can do just that. It is worth it when you encourage individuals and bless families following the will of God for their lives.

Objection 3: I don't know what to do. Many times people overlook the personal growth that comes from volunteering in leadership. It is true that they may not know what to do . . . did any of us? Let them know that you will be there for them, you will explain things to them, not judge them, and give them freedom to learn and grow. (Learning keeps you young, you know!) Commonly God brings new experiences into our lives to stretch us beyond ourselves, to teach us to rely on Him and bring about more Christ-likeness in us.

Objection 4: I'm afraid to speak in front of people or lead a group. Fear squeals its objections and keeps good people in bondage to the status quo. Be kind when dealing with the feelings of fear that threaten to overwhelm the person. Reassure them that the position fits their God-given talents and that others will be there to help. It's a team effort. Be excited that this gives them the opportunity to conquer fears, build faith and enjoy growth.

You CAN inspire others to leap over their own objections and choose the many life-changing rewards of leading a homeschool group. Ultimately, you or they cannot do it all, but Christ through you CAN.

Growing with you,

Denise Hyde

http://www.homeschoolgroupleader.com/

Make it Personal

No one can do what you can like you can. Your life experiences give you an ability to relate to the homeschool families in your group like no else. That is what makes you a great homeschool group leader.

Your story--the way you overcame challenges, the why you made decisions, the learning-curve you went through, your personality and personal growth, your strengths, your weaknesses, your talents, and the things you love--all make you unique. These things make up your story. They make up you.

Thank you for being you. Thank you for your dedication to serve the homeschooling community. You are making a difference. Your sacrifice of time and energy is admirable. It is because of your leadership and support that many families can have the strength to continue in their calling.

Our heart here at Homeschool Group Leader is to applaud you today. You are amazing!

Here is an inspiring video to remind you of how influential your heart of service truly is. Today, embrace your story and inspire others with a personal touch.

http://www.stservicemovie.com/


Have a fabulous Thanksgiving!
Denise & Kristen

Homeschool Group Leader

P.S. Watch for a special discount on our book, One by One, coming up soon!

Why Should I Even Consider Leading a Group?

Honestly, it's a challenge to lead a homeschool group. A common saying in Texas is that leading homeschoolers is like trying to herd cats. Their independence and love for freedom can make them seem hard to pull together.

But there are huge benefits to being a leader of these wonderfully-unique homeschoolers. It's an opportunity to:

serve others
showcase your talents and gifts
bring the homeschool community together
increase community awareness of homeschooling
provide much-needed encouragement and support
allow for the exciting exchange of ideas
accomplish something that stretches you
keep you from getting bored
see the fruit of your vision
gain skills that can be used in other areas of your life
gain confidence
build lasting relationships
learn to conquer fears
force you to be more organized
help you set your priorities in order

and last but not least. . . Somebody's got to do it. ;-) Why not you??

You can do it!
Denise and Kristen
www.homeschoolgroupleader.com

Your Questions are So Good

On our site Homeschool Group Leader, we have been amazed at the great questions you've been asking us. Each question is important to us. You are important to us.

We have prayed for you this morning. We prayed that you would have wisdom and that the Lord would strengthen you and encourage your heart to do this great task He's given you.

One of the most common Biggest Questions has been how to get your families more involved in your group. It can be so frustrating to have no one volunteer to help or even show up for an event that you've poured your heart and time into. We've been there.

Once, Denise scheduled a field trip to an alligator farm in our area. She thought it was the perfect summertime field trip and had even gotten feedback that people wanted to go. The day came for the trip and only two families out of 50 showed up! Denise was a little discouraged.

But she learned from it.

• She listened to why people didn't show: the heat, the mosquitoes, and summertime vacations. So from then on, she only scheduled early summer field trips that were indoors.
  
  
• She determined that summer field trips just didn't work as well for our group--attendance was low for all our summer activities down here in the Texas heat.
  
  
• She chose not to take it personally and began to design the field trips to fit the flow of the group. During the rest of the summer, she would simply pass out info on field trips that the families could do on their own. We completely took August off, with field trips as a group picking back up in September.

This worked really well for our group to encourage involvement. Your group may have a totally different dynamic and climate than ours, but people are the same everywhere. People need to be heard, understood and appreciated. One way you can easily do this and increase participation is to listen well and act on what you hear your families saying. It's a way of serving them, of meeting their needs and appreciating them.

We hope that in sharing our experience, you will be able to better understand and serve your own group. We will be sharing even more experiences in our coming ebook that will guide you as you lead your group to success.

Praying for you,
Kristen and Denise
www.homeschoolgroupleader.com

The Pitcher

I love pitchers.

I love their shape. I love their symbolism of pouring out. I love their uniqueness--how each one is so different and beautiful and purposeful.

When I see a pitcher, I am drawn to it. To me, it is a symbol of refreshment. It represents home, hospitality, and warmth.

I once served as a women's ministry leader and gave one hand-picked pitcher away each month to honor a woman in the group. I chose the woman based upon her selfless giving. I also chose women who I felt needed encouragement and to be honored.

A pitcher can't pour out what it doesn't have inside, and a pitcher doesn't quench thirst in and of itself, it carries the true refreshment. It is available to serve.

To me, the pitcher became a picture of these women who quietly served behind the scenes--vessels of honor, poured out by God. These women added beauty to everything around them and each one of them served with her own unique personality and talents in very different areas of need.

Within your group, you can encourage your special givers by looking for the ways they give behind the scenes. You can bring this to light by honoring them publicly or by just sending them a personal note. But everyone needs to be appreciated and seen.

A good leader serves. Recognizing your givers who "lead" behind the scenes is a way to serve them and lift them above yourself. It also shows that you are not a great leader by yourself--it takes everybody. And that was really my heart as I handed out those pitchers over the years--the group couldn't have been what it was without them.

Your friend,

Denise

www.homeschoolgroupleader.com

Amazing Grace

I have been inspired.

My family watches a lot of movies together. Our weekly family night is often spent tucked under wooden tv trays laden with a favorite meal and everybody crowded on the couches to watch a great flick. We love great movies.

I saw Amazing Grace this weekend and it took my breath away. It is a film chronicling William Wilberforce's long-running fight to abolish slavery across the British Empire. At the end, the famous hymn is played on a bagpipe, and I could not help but worship and weep.

But what touched me even more than the incredible sacrifice and dedication of this great man on behalf of other human beings is that God put passion inside each of us. You wouldn't be leading if He hadn't.

You are a person of passion!

What did He specifically call you to? Have you forgotten? Bring it out. Dust it off and USE it. Use it to encourage. Use it to inspire. Use it to fight for freedom.

We live in an incredible day of opportunity. Let us use our servant positions for good and for God's glory. Homeschooling is a powerful platform from which we can work to do God's work in this world and make it a better place.

As the movie so eloquently portrayed-- do NOT give up doing good. You will get tired. You may even feel hopeless at times. You may feel you are doing no good to anyone. But Homeschool Group Leader is here to lift up your hands and God will lift up your head. Do not give up.

Two days before William Wilberforce died, Parliament signed into law that no one across the British empire could own slaves. The English economy greatly suffered and many colonies died out as a result of the law, but Wilberforce had been obedient to God's call on his life and this world was made better because of it.

Now, let us go out and do likewise.
Kristen
www.homeschoolgroupleader.com

The Path to Encouragement

Have you heard the saying that humility is not thinking of yourself as small, but it is not thinking of yourself at all?! It is such an insightful saying and the key to successful homeschool group leadership!

Humility will enable you to encourage your members with a true genuineness. From a sincere desire to help others succeed, you can express many ways to lift them up on their home schooling journey.

There are several ways to put this desire to encourage into action as you communicate through speaking or writing that are good:

• open up about yourself--others will be able to relate in part or all of your story. It comes with risks to self, but the rewards are worth it.
• show sympathy to each--this is a response of sensing and sharing in their feelings, needs and experiences.
• compliment their talents--appreciate the work and special touch that each give to the group.
• give credit to all involved--success comes from the understanding that we did not get it done without others.
• always speak well of others--the biggest encouragement will come when they can trust that you always speak well of everyone in the group whether they are there or not.

Out of your humble leadership and genuine encouragement your group's members will feel safe, comfortable, understood, and appreciated. You will be establishing an environment for building some great friendships and supporting really great home schools.

Then when you see their wonderful smiles, their friendships, their confidence in home schooling, you can smile contentedly and give all the credit to whom it is truly due--the Lord Jesus.

Thanking my Lord,
Denise
www.homeschoolgroupleader.com