Too Busy to be the Expert

Even during this busy Christmas season, homeschool group leaders are often contacted by prospective homeschooling families that are exploring the possibility of educating their children at home. It can be difficult to keep your family priorities in place, take care of current homeschool group commitments, AND help these people understand their next steps.

Keep it simple. Take down their name, phone number and email address. Tell them you will send them some great information by email to get them started. Then invite them to call you back when they have read these and have definitely made their decision to homeschool.

What can you send them? Here are some suggestions:

1. This Mary Pride article is a great one to answer basic questions and start them on their way: http://www.home-school.com/Articles/GetStarted.html


2. A link to your state and local homeschool laws and regulations (usually found at your state homeschool group's website)


3. A link to your homeschool group website or web page that explains what your local group is all about.
   

Send this email out to the family as quickly as possible. Don't think about it too hard or too long. Give yourself permission not to expend all your energy on someone who isn't homeschooling yet. You are there to get them information, not convince them.

Believe us, it is tempting and easy to soak up tons of time chatting with someone on the phone who's just gathering information. And then they never even show up to any of your events or meetings. Do yourself and your group a favor, and save the bulk of your energy for those who are already committed to the journey of homeschooling and to your local group.

Have wonderful Christmas season,
Denise & Kristen

7 Habits of Very Organized People

Just a few recent stints of de-cluttering my home makes me feel like I have been set free from mental bondage. LOL. Yes, I keep things way too long, always thinking that I am going to do something with them someday.

But the piles grow and become all-too-overwhelming after awhile. After so many times of writing it on my "to-do-list-that-never-gets-done," I begin to just ignore the ideas/piles and the pressure they bring. So, for today, I am being a realist and throwing out or giving away several things that I know I'll never get done.

In the process I found this printed ebook, "Tips to Get Organized and to Declutter Your Home." Skimming it quickly, I was reminded of an advertisement for a book I saw recently that claimed the secret to success. The premise was to just do what you already know to do! Ah, yes, that would work, wouldn't it!

Well, to summarize this whole ebooklet for you before I declutter it into the trash. . . just take every room or problem area that you fight and put this word in front of it--SIMPLIFY. Yep, that's it.

Simplify your routine.
Simplify your possessions.
Simplify your meals.
Simplify your cleaning.

Simplify, simplify, simplify. It sounds so simple, doesn't it?

The last page did have this interesting list, and I just have to pass it on. (I could not find the author listed anywhere.)


The 7 Habits of Very Organized People

1. They have a place for everything. Every item has a consistent, assigned home.


2. They put things back. Whenever an item has been removed from its assigned home, it is used and then immediately returned to its home. There are no temporary holding places.


3. They write things down. Organized people make lists and notes, and keep these in one consistent place--such as a planner, notebook, computer or calendar. They don't try to remember things in their heads. They simply reference their lists and notes throughout the day.


4. They don't allow papers to pile up. Papers are filed each day, not left to grow into mountains. Mail is opened over the trash bin, bills are tucked into a system until bill-paying day, and magazines are read within a week or two and then recycled.


5. They don't procrastinate. When something has to be done, organized people schedule time to do it and then they keep that scheduled appointment. They know that the more they delay, the more likely opportunities will pass.


6. They set goals and assign deadlines. Organized people know that if they want to get things done, they need to know exactly what they want the end result to be. . . and by what date. They review these goals often, and set aside time each day to work on achieving them. They review what they've accomplished and never forget to reward themselves for reaching their goal.


7. They only keep what they use and/or enjoy. Organized people can't stand anything taking up space that doesn't have a useful or pleasurable purpose in their lives. They are big believers in simplicity. [italics mine]

Well, I'm relieved that I only have 7 things to work on to become a "very organized person." That's very encouraging. How about you?

Simply thankful,

Denise

Wednesday's Wisdom: Time Management & Self-Control

Time can be an enemy with no mercy--that gives no second chances.

Time is particularly difficult for me to manage. I always have good intentions and plan to get important things done, but by the end of the day I feel like time defeated me again. So many things are left undone. Too many minutes went by without accomplishment.

This week I read an article written in 1967 called "The Tyranny of the Urgent" that spoke to my heart just as if it had been written today. Had the author seen the future and observed my life to write it? In it he gets straight to the heart of the struggle between the important and the urgent. It's good--really good.
"Tyranny of the Urgent"

Reading the article guided me to self-evaluate and to see the need for self-control. I am definitely better than I used to be, but I am still trying to defeat this giant every day. (We are more than conquerors through Christ our Lord.) I know that it will get better as I practice disciplines and establish winning habits.

"Control your time; control your destiny." You, as Homeschool Group Leaders, may need to drastically evaluate your time and learn to not let the urgent (for example, calls from members) steal all your time. Setting boundaries on your schedule for group duties will help you be successful in the important.

Here's a blog with a lot of practical ideas on implementing the truth in the article for you at home:
"Fighting the Tyranny of the Urgent at Home"

~Remember, take just enough time to read these where they are helpful to you, but not so much time where you are robbed of your day. ;-)

Learning to be wise in my time,
Denise
http://www.homeschoolgroupleader.com/
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Tuesday's Tip

50-10

To manage your time as a leader, think in blocks of time. Work 50 minutes, then take 10 minutes for yourself. Doing something special for yourself a few minutes every hour will help you feel like a million bucks at the end of the day instead of like a worn-out dollar bill!

Friday's Answer: Spouse Support

About a year ago, I was able to meet some wonderful homeschool group leaders at the Woodlands conference here in Texas. One couple I met has worked together in leadership with the wife being the primary leader of the homeschool group.

The husband stated that with his job, etc, he was not able to lead, but that he was able to support her. I was able to ask him how he serves his family and wife while she attends her meetings, talks on the phone and serves the group. This husband (who wished to remain anonymous) had some really great answers that I'll list here. (Disclaimer: We are not responsible if you use this list as a not-so-subtle hint for your spouse!)

9 Ways a Dad Supports His Group Leader Wife

1. Cooks--frees up time for her to be on the phone with group members by cooking a meal for the family
2. Bathtime--gives the kids their baths during the evening while she is on the computer answering emails
3. Grocery Shops--does the grocery shopping while she is home reading with the kids
4. Mr. Principal--is involved as the principal of their home school to keep the family on track
5. Grades--grades the subjects of math and science for all the kids each evening lightening her load
6. Labs--is responsible for the science labs with the family
7. Watches--takes care of and watches the kids during leader meetings
8. Encourages--lifts her up when down and encourages her to continue leading and keep going even on difficult days
9. Freedom--tries not to ever put her on a guilt trip

It's such a team effort, isn't it?! Let's remember to appreciate our supporting spouses and recognize all the wonderful ways they serve, help, support, give, encourage, balance, pray, lead, and care for us and the success of our families and our work. They are amazing!

Hats off to our spouses,
Denise

http://www.homeschoolgroupleader.com/
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Friday's Answer: Motivating Your Kids

How do you get a child motivated to do their lessons?

We've all been there. Some kids are self-starters and you hardly have to do anything to motivate them and then some (even in the same family) need a lot of encouragement to stay on task. One thing I have found that works to motivate no matter what their learning style or your teaching style is to let kids have large doses of time to do what they LOVE. When the creative streak strikes, let them surrender to it. Set the books and schedule aside and let them LIVE. May we never forget why we homeschool--for the FUN of it! Allowing time for the fun of homeschooling is just one way to keep the balance in your life as a homeschool educator and leader.

One recent, beautiful summer evening, as my husband and daughter were headed to the Texas hill country for church camp and my baby girl and I were snuggling inside the house, my boys got a hankering to tinker. This is what I caught them up to.

Yeah for homeschooling! It's moments of discovery like this that make all the hard work and diligence of constantly encouraging and inspiring our kids to do their lessons worth it.

Breaking it down for you,
Kristen
www.homeschoolgroupleader.com

The Economides' book that gets you right on the money is NOW in our Leader Store! I personally own this book and have loaned it out to several friends--it's that good.

Guest Friday's Answer: Being THERE for the Group

We're excited to bring you leadership wisdom from wonderful veteran leaders around the country in our "Guest Friday's Answer."

Our first guest post is by Sheila Campbell, the Leader Liasion for the Texas Home School Coalition. She co-founded Integrity Home Educators with her husband in 1994 in Plainview and faithfully led it for over a decade, recently stepping down as the youngest of her children is graduating.

She is a gifted writer and you can read one of her encouraging articles about extraordinary leadership from ordinary leaders here.

Sheila has been an abundant blessing to us at Homeschool Group Leader and we know she will be to you as well. ~Kristen and Denise

I'm not sure I can be THERE for the group. I have 4 grades (again) this year, and my oldest is in Grade 12 - he really requires a lot of work this year. BUT, I'm the only one motivated to do anything at all, as well as having the history behind my homeschooling and the area. How do I do something for the group without being overwhelmed?

Veteran leaders are always needed in leadership, but they do not have to be the primary leader. Find a venue, such as moms’ night out, where you can share your expertise and knowledge of the group’s history and make that your primary focus of leadership.

Make it clear at the beginning of the year that this will be the only activity/event that you will be responsible for and then be careful not to add any thing else to your duties. If no one steps up to the plate and takes responsibility for leadership in other areas of your group, then let those activities go.

One of the biggest and most important aspects of a good leader is the ability to pass the baton. If you want to see the group continue to grow and thrive after you’re gone, then you must not only pass down the responsibilities, but also the vision behind them.
Sheila Campbell

Tuesday's Tip

Rest & Refresh

You can't expect to do your best if you're sick or tired. Fatigue will fog your decisions and hinder your responsibilities. You need plenty of rest. Take care of yourself by taking time to refresh your body and your mind. Avoid things that are unhealthy and take a good vitamin supplement. Being refreshed will give you the energy you need to lead.

Friday's Answer: Balancing Act! Part 2

How do I balance the demands of leadership with my family and own homeschool?

We've answered this question once, but let's approach it from another angle as well.

We want you to remember three important things about striking a balance:

1. You don't have to be perfect to be a successful leader. Be your lovely self! Expect to make some mistakes. If someone has a problem with that, that's their problem, not yours.

2. You don't have to be perfect for your group to be great. There will be gaps in your leadership. Let others fill in. If no one fills in, it may not be something the Lord wanted done right now.

3. Part of finding the balance with all the pressing things you must do is for you to release yourself from trying to be everything to and for everybody. You can't be. Only Christ can be all things to all people.

Isn't this freeing? We want you to feel liberated to be the homeschool group leader YOU were created to be. And only that!

Appreciating all our wonderful variety of talents,
Kristen & Denise

www.homeschoolgroupleader.com

Friday's Answer: Balancing Act! Part 1

How do I balance the demands of leadership with my family and own homeschool?

Ever feel like the circus performer with all the plates spinning in the air at once on very thin poles? Homeschool group leaders often find themselves suddenly spinning several plates in the air at once, trying to find the delicate balance between their group responsibilities, their homeschooling responsibilities and their family responsibilities. Not to mention being perky and loving at all times to all people, especially family members!

It often feels impossible. But striking a balance between these important and necessary responsibilities is critical to avoiding burnout as a leader.

Try these three things to help you find the balance:

* SET A DATE-- Where do you need some protected time? Find some time each week that nothing can infringe upon. For our family, it was Family Night on Tuesday nights. To preserve precious family time, we set aside one night a week to just "BE" with one another. We might play games, watch a movie, go out to eat or do absolutely nothing. The point was that it was OUR family's choice how that night went, and we didn't let anything else get scheduled on that night. It was sacred time.

* SET A TIME--Is school time hit or miss at your house? Do your kids know what's expected each day? To help my elementary-aged children keep on task with their lessons, I had to set aside a specific time for their lessons--and then I had to be accessible to them to answer their questions and hold them accountable. I might be close by doing laundry or I might actually sit at the kitchen table and grade past lessons, but my children functioned so much better when I was available consistently to them during schooltime.

* SET A ROUTINE--It has been proven over and over that people are more productive when they work within the boundaries of a routine. For me as a leader, that meant that our family schooled in the mornings; I worked on group things in the afternoon and family things came after 5 pm. This helped me so much to avoid neglecting these very important areas of my life. I discovered that I got more done within each area and what didn't get done could wait till the next day--the world did not stop turning!

I resisted structure in my life for so many years. It is exciting to live by the seat of your pants, but not always effective. At least, not on a day in-day out basis. Rushing from one crisis to the next can leave a leader feeling like she's spinning out of control. When I finally gave myself permission to set a date, set a time and set a routine, I became more effective all the way around.

Blessings as you find your balance,
Kristen

www.homeschoolgroupleader.com

Tuesday's Tip

You Have Permission!

Sometimes as a leader you have to give yourself permission to say no to good and right things at just the right time. Take the phone off the hook for an afternoon and do a happy dance; set regular, guilt-free hours to enjoy homeschooling your kids; delegate as many jobs as you can, and by all means, take time to feast on the delicious Word of God each and every day.

We at Homeschool Group Leader are going to practice what we are preaching. For this week only, there will be no Friday's Answer. Enjoy your families, we'll enjoy ours, and have a Christ-filled Christmas!

Many Christmas Blessings,
Kristen & Denise
www.homeschoolgroupleader.com

An Update & Tides

Have things been as crazy at your house as it has been at each of ours? These last couple of weeks have flown by and have been crammed with life happenings.

Kristen and I have hardly seen each other, much less worked on our writings. Yesterday, we got to steal an hour together on the phone. That was good. As we talked, we reconfirmed that family always comes first. We don't want to be obsessive with our work here at Homeschool Group Leader--as good as it is and as much as we enjoy it. It's all about balance and keeping priorities in the right order.

Maybe you're wondering what's been going on. . . . Thanks for asking! We've had lots of company and family visiting, each have taken vacations, started our home schooling, had times of sickness or migraines, had church activities, kept up with Hurricane Gustav (was ready to evacuate at a radar's notice) and even watched the RNC. Even now I have Gustav evacuees here staying with me from Baton Rouge. You don't hear it on the news because it's not New Orleans, but they've been without electricity all week. 400 homes have trees on them. Our friends were actually sleeping in their car to have a little air conditioning in the overbearing humidity and heat.

I've noticed over the years that life seems to happen in waves. The tide comes in where everything happens at once. Then the natural ebb and flow brings times of refreshing and calm. During the stressful or busy times as high waves keep crashing around and on us, we can easily feel overwhelmed. It is important to keep your head up (priorities) above the waves to avoid drowning. Don't panic, stay calm, tread water, hold your breath, breathe. All the while remember the best advice a lifeguard can give--look up!

"Therefore I will look unto the Lord; I will wait for the God of my salvation: my God will hear me." Micah 7:7

Resting in His wonderful mercy,

Denise

http://www.homeschoolgroupleader.com/

Going to The Source!

ATTENTION ALL LEADERS: YOU CANNOT KEEP POURING OUT FOR OTHERS IF YOU ARE EMPTY AND DRY.

How many times do we allow our service to others to overtake our schedule and cause us to push aside our quiet time? It is all too common for leaders to be so busy pouring out for others that they neglect themselves and their times with the Lord.

You cannot give out of what you do not have. He has prepared times of refreshing for you. He is the Source of what you have to give! He is the source of all our joy, strength, peace and wisdom.

"The human heart does not replenish itself with sleep. The body does, but not the heart....We replenish our hearts not with sleep, but with the Word of God and prayer." John Piper

It is good to get up early each day and have intentional, consistent quality time with the Lord. It prepares us for the day ahead. Now, it doesn't mean that everything will be perfect afterwards, but it does mean that you will have more peace and readiness for whatever happens. You will have confidence knowing that you have already been under the spout. Once you have received your filling for service, you will be overflowing.

Seeking the Source,
Denise & Kristen

If I Were a Suitcase, Where Would I Be?

Our eyes scanned the sides of the interstate searching desperately for any sign of the green suitcase. . .

Just an hour before, we had been feverishly working on an article for Homeschool Group Leader when a friend drove up in the driveway, frustrated, tired and needing help. They had lost their suitcase along the interstate when it had blown off the top of their mini-van. Without thinking, we jumped into Denise's car and zoomed to the rescue. What should have taken a few minutes, turned into over an hour of looping around and around under overpasses and scouring feeder roads for the elusive case.

Have you had days like this? We never did finish that article. . .

Sometimes things won't go as you've planned them. Don't beat yourself up when things don't go perfectly. When there are interruptions and unexpected detours, be flexible and available and enjoy the ride. The immediate can be as important as your to-do list. Instead of stressing about what's not getting done, laugh as we did, saying out loud, "If I were a suitcase, where would I be?"

Going with the flow,
Denise & Kristen
www.homeschoolgroupleader.com

Workbooks are My Friends

Let's talk.

Leading a homeschool group can be time-consuming and tough. For two years, I spent countless hours answering e-mails, putting out fires, and giving advice over the phone to people I'd never met. By the time I had accomplished my daily leadership duties, I was tired--physically and emotionally. There honestly wasn't a lot of me left over for teaching my children in the creative way I wanted to.

We homeschool group leaders can often be trail-blazing and innovative overachievers. What we do is so visible and we often receive great praise for our work or great condemnation for our mistakes. In an effort to please people, I found that I devoted much time and energy trying to keep people happy--happy with each other, happy with the group and happy with me.

And our homeschool suffered accordingly. I found I didn't have the time or energy to keep every plate spinning. Part of the problem was that I believed that a superior home education meant the ever-present presence of a hands-on mom. I had always had high expectations for myself and our homeschool. In the early years, I wrote our own curriculum with a friend and sat faithfully with my kids as they completed their reading, writing and 'rithmetic. The truth of the matter is that we all usually ended up in tears by the end of the day and I hadn't gotten a stitch of laundry, dishes or cooking done.

So, I kicked against the goads and swung the opposite direction--hands-off, borderline unschooling. We still did our morning devotionals together and bits and pieces of read-alouds. Nothing consistent, definitely noncommittal, totally sporadic. We were at the whim of our daily desires . . . and I admit, that was fun. . . for awhile. Then they began to cry that they were bored and began to bicker and fuss. School wasn't fun for us anymore.

As I daily answered all those e-mails and phone calls, I secretly hoped my public school administration family members wouldn't drop by and fervently prayed over a solution for our family. Seeing my distress, my husband suggested we have more structure and that I <> keep grades. They need accountability, he said. He could see what I could not.

So, in time, I baby-stepped into some workbooks and began to administer timed tests every Friday on important things like math facts and spelling words. But that carefree part of me clung to the things we loved like living books and notebooking and devotionals in the morning and oral exams and lots of field trips. I noticed I wasn't hearing so many cries of "I don't like school" or "I'm bored." It was delightful.

I'm being very real with you here. We are just people doing our best by our children, trying to make a difference for eternity. What did it matter if all the world thought I was an awesome homeschool group leader, if I lost the heart of my kids and squelched their natural desire for learning in the process?

So, I learned that workbooks are my friends and serve as useful tools during this season of my life. And just like an uncluttered house sets your mind free to be creative and productive, I felt the daily work in the workbooks set us free to learn to our fullest. I was happy because we weren't hopping around anymore at my whim and they were happy because they knew what to expect every day.

From this whole experience, I have learned to let go of trying to keep everyone happy (it is impossible, by the way). I have learned how freeing it is to adapt our homeschool to fit our lifestyle, not the other way around. And I have learned that simple is just as excellent an educational approach as complex. Now, if you'll excuse me--the phone's ringing.

Your friend,
Kristen
http://www.homeschoolgroupleader.com/

The Top Four Traps for Homeschool Group Leaders to Avoid!

We are excited about offering this free mini-course for leaders.

Born of our own experiences, this course is designed to warn you of certain pitfalls that homeschool group leaders can face.

For example, we remember how in the beginning we were clueless on how to handle a lot of different, strong personalities on the leadership team. As a team, we had to learn the fine art of giving up one's own rights for the rights of another.

This course will give you an alertness to those dangers that we didn't have and hopefully save you a lot of time and pain. When you heed the warning signs out there, you can steer clear of the danger and successfully lead your group.

To get your FREE copy of the mini-course on "The Top 4 Traps for Homeschool Group Leaders to Avoid!," then click here .

Happy Trails!
Denise & Kristen
http://www.homeschoolgroupleader.com/